I’m some sort of crazy social worker. Really, I am. I like to say I run a finishing school or I’m an unattractive Miss Jean Brodie. I had the opportunity to attend a conference for what I “do” at the Mount Washington Hotel & Resort and naturally I jumped on it.

How could anyone stay sober on a veranda like this?

Here she is. The Brooke Astor of the white mountains. More blue, more blue. CAPsplore wasn’t really about the conference but about me being drunk and visiting an old friend.

Phase 1: The Car Barn
At some point in the 80s when the hotel was sold a couple of times and my father did the numbers on one of the deals. He told me that somewhere hidden on the grounds of the hotel was barn full of the hotel’s fleet of antique vehicles. Goal #1 was to find the barn.

Mystery building 1. I can’t remember if it ever had a use, but I can’t imagine cars could fit in it.

The Bretton Arms.
Miss Dumplington, Miss Perez (the milf, Milfée) and I headed towards the stables to see if maybe the car barn was in the vicinity. We arrived at just the right time because the horses were being led from the barn to their adorable condo adjacent pasture. The Fairways are adorable and their greatest value to the world is that they don’t spoil the view.

Look, elite Mt. Washington Resort horses.

Our next stop was to visit the decaying brown building on the edge of the parking lot. It was actually in a lot better shape than I was expecting and Miss Dumplington & Miss Perez (the milf) discovered that it contained a printing press. It more than likely produced the hotel’s newspaper.

Onward.

For many years, the front of the Mount Washington Hotel was beautiful while the rear of the hotel was disgusting and unpainted. Five star on one side and flea bag motel on the other. I should take this time to point out that when I was a child, the hotel while unquestionably grand and beautiful was pretty much a dump. Parts of the lobby had ugly carpeting and function rooms smelled like urine.

Bringing up the rear.

The goal of this constitutional was to reach Abandonment 0 or the first abandoned building I ever thought to explore. I believe the building was a restaurant of some sort but it is hard to tell.

Bridge to nowhere.

The swingset of doom and death.

Finally, abandonedment 0.

And the nearby bathtubs.

• May 31st, 2009
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